Five Thousand Naira Note, Naija Boys and Cashless Policy!

He! He! He! I laugh in Spanish oh! There’s indeed a good side to everything….

The introduction of the Cashless (Cashlite) Policy in Nigeria met the anger of the Nigerian People. As usual, the Nigerian populace vituperated and insulted policy makers. “How can they charge me for withdrawals in my bank?”  “Is it not my money? My hard earned money!”, “We do not yet have sufficient ATM machines or POS terminals and they are preaching cashless!” “The Internet systems are pathetic and they are preaching cashless!” Why should I be penalized for making withdrawals? These and many more were the angry comments from Nigerians.

At first, the penalty was 100 naira for every 1000 naira above 150,000naira withdrawn or lodged by individual customers and 200 naira for every 1000 naira above 1,000,000naira withdrawn or lodged by corporate customers. Indeed, the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) was determined to enforce the policy and supposedly to encourage the utilization of electronic payment system. The cry of the people however made CBN push up the limit to 500,000 naira for individuals and 3,000,000 naira for corporate bodies with three and five percent handling charge for individuals and corporate bodies respectively and gradually it began to sink in… the cashless policy had come to stay...

Now, to why I was laughing in Spanish (LOL), my ever sure ‘naija’ boys all of a sudden embraced the phrase and not the policy. The other day I heard one young broke dude saying ‘sorry, I’m cashless’ in response to a girl asking him for five hundred naira! And seriously, my colleague at work said same the other day! My point, Boys no longer give money on impulse because they don’t carry cash!

But alas, while I was still rejoicing with boys at a perfect excuse, the CBN announced the introduction of the 5000 naira note! And guess what? the government says no going back! Yaay! Go girls! Now! I’m rejoicing with girls! At least every correct guy should have a few five thousand naira notes in his wallet and not give the lame excuse of having only cards or rather being cashless! Ha ha ha ha! Now I’m laughing in Japaneese!

But Seriously! As in very seriously! What are the Policy makers thinking? This is apparently most contradictory! But then, the CBN governor, Lamido Sanusi, says the introduction of the 5,000 naira note would complement the cashless policy. Maybe I lack understanding of simple economics, because I certainly do not understand how! And to make matters worse they plan to convert N5, N10 and N20 naira notes to coins! We certainly are going to have to deal with inflation because Nigerians are averse to coins! But again, they say No! They maintain it won’t cause inflation and contend that there’s no link between the conversion/introduction of new notes and inflation! Whew! Let me just rest my case because I’m a lawyer and not an economist…But I respectfully submit that whilst the CBN carries out its  legitimate functions, let them remember the preamble of the preamble of the Constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria… Let them remember ‘we the people oh’!

Meanwhile, ladies! Don’t let naija boys use your head oh! Withdrawing cash isn’t criminal, there’s just a 3% handling charge for withdrawals that exceed five hundred thousand naira. And for rich girls like me*wink*, Cashless or Cashlite, 5000 naira note or coin, we’ll spend the money anyhow! (Ema dami duro….*laughing heartily and singing Davido’s Song*).

Omoaderoba^cn

 

Spiritual Deposit: Insurance for a Pained Soul.

Desperately in need of cash, I drove hurriedly to the nearest ATM machine and I hit the keypads with desperation as if to make the machine work faster. The exact sum I needed was the exact sum left in the account. So I clicked on it anyway. And alas! A message popped up on the screen…It appeared like a mixture of Greek and Spanish. The New bank Policy required a minimum account balance of 2000 naira so whatever sum I wanted to withdraw had to be short of 2000…. I wished I could communicate with the machine and tell it that I wanted all my money and I didn’t mind closing my account! After all, it was my money! My hard earned money!  How can this people just initiate Policies just like that! For goodness sake, the last time I checked, one could have a zero naira minimum balance! Unfortunately, it was a weekend and there was no bank official to yell at so I left… angry and bitter …. It was much later I understood the essence of the minimum balance: it was necessary to keep an account alive even when dormant…

Have you ever lost a loved one? Have you been through a nasty break up? Have you experienced the pain of loss in any form? Have you been hurt? Have you been in pain? How did you survive it? My answer? My minimum balance! My Deposit! My deposit kept me alive when I was dormant…

I have indeed been through pain not once not twice and sometimes when I’m in d deep of pain, rejection or loss, I listen to all sorts of lines and phrases but I cannot hear, I feel the warmth of a hug or a warm handshake but then the touch disappears like evaporating water, I see pity on the faces of others, but I cannot see beyond their faces so I do not care…Either nothing or everything makes sense, it’s either I’m making excuses for the one who caused the pain and blaming myself or I’m swearing and cursing or simply just hoping to die. Yet still, someone says to me: You are a strong woman…one of the strongest I know….My secret? In retrospect, I’ll say again, My Deposit!

Sometimes, we read the Bible and pray and go to Church and we feel like it’s just a routine, or just another habit. If only we understand we are building up a deposit. All Christians need a deposit of God’s word, of good words, of good/upright times so that when bad thoughts and bad times and bad words take the center stage and we can’t get on our knees to pray or open our Bibles to read, what we had on the inside of us, before the pain, can spring forth and sooth us. That’s how I have survived…That’s how I have pulled through, that’s how I overcome. I don’t know how it happens but I know it happens…I hear a Rhema from my Spirit or a song jumps into my mind and I begin to sing in my heart and then I see in my mind’s eye, the smile and the cheer of a loved one and then my lips begin to move, I’m smiling…I’m singing …I’m strengthened… and then they say I’m strong…hmm….Lord, I’m thankful for the grace.

And so, to you I’ll say: Make hay while the sun shines, seek the Lord while He is near, subscribe to a viable insurance policy, not just for your car or for your house but for your soul…Fortify your walk with God, that’s the best deposit, it won’t guarantee you a pain free life, but it sure would see you through the pain, it would keep your account running even when you become dormant. You need a deposit, a minimum balance that would keep you running when you can’t run. Invest in your Spirit-man today!

Shalom!

Quick Thoughts on God, Us, Church, Prayer and Tithes!

 God: Only a fool says there’s no God, His Sovereignty can’t be contested!  For everything comes from God alone, everything lives by his power and everything is for his glory (Romans 11:36). In His Sovereignty HE says, I’ll have mercy on whom I’ll have mercy on….(Romans 9:15) who can question Him? Believe it or not, He exists, He is God and He is Sovereign! Full stop!

Us: I ask myself? If God is just sovereign and can do as He pleases, why can’t we do as we please too? After all, he would have mercy on who he chooses not necessarily the most righteous… What does God then expect from us? ATTITUDE! A right attitude! One driven by: Reverence for his sovereignty, Love for Him and mankind and Faith in Him. For without faith it is impossible to please Him!

Prayer:  God loves the attitude of prayer! It’s not so much about the content but about the attitude….one that shows u reverence God and that You believe in Him ….for His word says: While we are yet speaking He has heard us  (Isaiah 65:24)i.e. before you start to pray He has heard already yet He wants you to Pray! Why? The Attitude of prayer…!

Church:  We mustn’t forsake the gathering of believers as some do…. (Hebrews10:25) The truth is Church gatherings help us to grow and so we all need it. Which Church should we go? Catholic, Protestant, Adventist, Pentecostal or what? See what Jesus said in John 4: 21-24. “ The time is coming, when we’ll no longer be concerned about whether we worship here or in Jerusalem for it is not where we worship that counts but how we worship…’” Come on!  Quit complaining! Just find a Church and worship God truly!

Tithe:  The purpose of tithing is to teach you always to put God first in your lives_ Deut 14: 23b. Tithing should bring Joy and happiness to us, we must be happy to tithe. It’s for our own good in fact the people in the days of old ate their tithes… (Deut 14:23) in reverence. ..All God wants is  for us to acknowledge Him as the giver. And it’s awesome that He blesses us all the more for tithing.

                        Selah!

Big Brother Nigeria!

I read the most absurd headline of the year with awe and anger: “FG to send Soldiers to fight Islamists in Mali” I still tried to console myself by complaining about journalist and the way they couch headlines. But alas, this wasn’t about a journalist trying to couch a catchy headline. This was a fact! I held The Punch Newspaper of July 30 20012 very firmly not sure whether I was going to tear it or just toss out of the window. In vexatious curiosity however, I read on….

“Nigeria is committed to resolving the crisis in Mali especially as President Jonathan is a co-mediator in the crisis…” per Reuben Abati (Spokesperson to the President) Chai! Chineke! Kai! Egbami! I suddenly became multilingual. Mr. Abati’s explanation agitated me all the more! Goodness me! Isn’t it only a confused man that would leave his burning house to put out the fire in his neighbor’s! Or was I the confused one. Perhaps I do not have sufficient understanding of the workings of the international community. After all, I merely have just a diploma in International Affairs….so I’m perhaps just ignorant!

The Picture of my lecturer in the year 2003 struggling to convince us that Nigeria remained the Big Brother of Africa flashed through my mind. I remember us (my classmates) questioning the ‘Bigbrotherness’ of Nigeria and comparing Nigeria with countries like Ghana and SouthArica. This is 2012 and even the blind can see that these nations have fared better than Nigeria in every way!

In trying to rid myself of  ignorance, I embarked on a research on Nigeria’s foreign policy and  behold, I found that Africa  is not the center point of Nigeria’s foreign policy(a moot point though) What then is the most reasonable basis for our President’s brotherly intervention?  Can someone please tell me I’m ignorant and I just don’t understand? Can someone please make me understand!!!! Isn’t this a clear case of misplaced priority? Isn’t it all the more apparent that our President/ government is confused?

For goodness sake attacks by the violent Islamic sect, Boko Haram, intensifies by the day and yet!!!!! How on earth can we have a pending security issue which our troops have not been able to curtail and the government still seeks to send troops to another country to quell a similar insurgence!   

Whew! Can this government vex me more than this! I’m yet to get over the way and manner they purported to change the name of my Alma Mata (The great University of Lagos), the Oteh imbroglio and even the entire oil subsidy brouhaha and now this!!!!!!

I can only wish that like Moses was shunned in the bible when he attempted to settle a rift between two Israelites, Mali would also tell Nigeria to mind her business!!!! And Yes! I’m Christian and I should only pray and not curse my country or the government because ‘every government is ordained by God’ says the Holy book… Elmmm! True! Lord, I’m sorry … but please intervene quickly before the president vexes me again…quickly Lord please…

Meanwhile, on a lighter note, though I never watched the Big Brother Africa game show (I think it’s crap), It’s the news that South Afrrica’s representative won! Now tell me; who is the Big Brother still? Smile* I join the world to say Congrats Keagan! Three Hundred Thousand US Dollars no be small thing! Chuckle*

Omoaderoba.

The Truth at Thirty

“The truth is, it doesn’t feel the same anymore.” The words hit me like a time bomb on a bright Tuesday morning! I was helpless, lost, puzzled, awed, dumbfounded, perplexed, name it…The grip to my phone tightened; I pressed my butt firmly to my seat and sat straightened as if to prevent fainting. Warm tears trickled out of my bulging eyes and fell to my skirt and I just couldn’t stop the flow…
I could hear other lawyers stroll into the courtroom and I could see them all clad in black suits and scrambling for the cause-list to fill in their names. I knew I was in the court room but I was no longer sure of the reason I was there. The footsteps became quicker and lawyers hurriedly robed and settled into their seats. It was 9am and the judges would be in in a few minutes. Yet there I was motionless, not oblivious but helpless, just helpless… The tears dried up on my lightly made up face…He was the reason for the makeup, I expected to see him in court…Suddenly, I got up like a robot and went behind the Courtroom to sit with non-lawyers. I certainly was not going to enter appearance. The court room was filled to the brim and there were no other seats so I stood and stared into the air until I heard my name. A learned friend had been calling my name repeatedly across the court room! He walked towards me, elegantly robed and said: ‘Wunmi, ki lo se e’*, the tears erupted and I hugged him to cry all the more…wetting his gown…
We were going to get married, we just got an apartment and we were almost done furnishing. Like most couples at this stage, we disagreed more albeit to agree again. I had seen him on Sunday in ‘our’ apartment. We had parted on a good note, he dropped me off and we were both happy or so I thought …
On Monday, no calls from him, neither did he pick my repeated calls. I continued to call him on Tuesday morning and alas! He sent me an SMS… to say the truth!!! ‘So what’s the way forward hon?’ I asked in a note I dropped by his side mirror when I saw his car in the court premises that same Tuesday. Of course, I had tried to call him but he didn’t pick up. I sent him a mail asking the same question and behold! He replied: ‘Ayaam still in the attitude of prayer’. I was tad relieved! Yes! Relieved! Because I was sure that if it was about prayer, God would confirm what we had heard all the while.
Hadn’t God given me a word or even words? Didn’t his pastor confirm us as good for each other? Didn’t my mom’s pastor also do same? Didn’t our parents approve of us? Of Course! The Spiritual aspect was to my mind, more than settled so I was sure He would only get a confirmation. I would wait until his prayer session ended…it was a long wait, he refused to communicate during this period as he neither called nor picked my calls… minutes turned to hours, hours to days, days to weeks and then a month. My Handsome Christian Brother was still praying!
One Saturday evening, he picked up the phone when I called and I said to him: ‘Honey, How far with your prayers?’ and in a most hostile tone he said: ‘I said I would get back to you when I’m done praying’ Tears ticked down my eyes like a partially closed tap and the line cut…
Minutes later, I braced up and called him back, I told him I was on my way to his house that night and that I was going to move in with him until God answered his prayers and we agreed on the way forward. Though he claimed he was not home, I assured him I would wait at his gate till he arrived (was only threatening*smile*)
In another few minutes, I got an email from him and in it were these words:  ‘… I do not desire you as much…there’s no more time to experiment…’ And though I knew this was coming, I cringed in pain as I read the words. The End had come and painfully so…
The truth of the matter was that I knew! I always had the gut feeling… I knew…. I knew he didn’t desire me as much, I knew he didn’t love me as much I knew  this was coming…Yet still, his truth pierced me like a dagger to my soul, wounding my body and causing me to spend nights in the hospital. But yea though I ride through deep waters, I will not drown for the Lord would be with me (Isaiah 43:2) and truly He was.
Ade neither called nor come to see me in the hospital but God didn’t leave me, instead, He told me the greater truth: I am the Lord your redeemer, who punishes you for your own good and leads you along the path that you should follow… Weeping may last all night but joy comes in the morning (Isaiah 48:17, Psalm 30:5 LB).

I’m thirty and the clock is ticking. Ade’s truth hurts but the greater truth of God’s word heals. Joy cometh and of this I’m sure.
Let all the thirty plus single ladies shout the truth out loud with me in faith: ‘My Joy cometh!’
So shall it be! AMEN!
*meaning What's wrong with you?(Yoruba language)

 

This Thing Called Marriage

My father used to say it’s the most difficult institution! ‘Tougher than obtaining a University degree’; He says! And for me who getting my LL.B didn’t come easy, that’s something scary…
Many newlyweds say it’s beautiful. Yet, many that survive the first ten years say its bitter sweet.
Difficult, Beautiful, Bitter-Sweet! What an oxymoron marriage is!
Countless women (well, and men too I guess) have died in and for this thing called marriage. Many have been physically and internally injured and many are only enduring… I have in recent times watched countless divorce proceedings in court and OMG it’s all so scary.
With a plethora of sad marriages, people like me can only hope for the best! I hope another Divorce matter is not assigned to me soon. I need time to clear my head…maybe to bask in fictitious love stories or perhaps, some real life sweet marriage stories…
Meanwhile, I find consolation in neither my man nor in myself but in God’s word. For He said specifically unto me ‘…and the Light of Heaven shall shine upon the road ahead of you’… And though I’m shaky right now, LORD, I BELIEVE! Therefore, for this thing called Marriage, I am next in line! God bless my Marriage! AMEN.

Is he the one?

About Six feet, Pointed Nose, good legs and ehhhh light skin (not one of my fav features).
In totality, a handsome young man… older than me, compatible genotype, a lawyer, a Christian and from a tad good family background. What else can a woman ask for?
He is timely (a virtue I cherish), He loves to laugh, He loves football, He loves the Law and He loves God.
But! He is reserved, tad egocentric and not very expressive…I mean, show of love…like elmmm, I mean...not very romantic! Whew! Trust me! That’s a huge challenge for me…yeah, me: My birth alone called for attention…I grew up with lots of love and attention…well, let’s leave me, I’m talking about him.
Because of this “Buts”, I fear he doesn’t love me. I feel betrothed to him (well, at some point in my life I was wishing for that, for, I was tired of calculating whether a man was right or not…)
*Emi nko? Do I love him?…Yeah! I believe so! I have no butterflies but I sure have a strong desire to commit to this man, to understand him, tolerate him, to be faithful to him and to grow profoundly in love for him.
I ask myself, are you sure this willingness isn’t because you are 30 and time is of the essence? Or did I choose merely for lack of a better option? (Perhaps, that’s why he has chosen me too). The answers, I can’t say! But what I can say and know for sure is that with respect to this matter, God has given me a blank cheque (Job 22:28LB) and I have put his name on it. He is the one I have chosen. God bless my decision! AMEN!

*yoruba language which means: And me?